Intimacy Anorexia

Healing Together: Strategies for Couples Overcoming Intimacy Anorexia

In this post, I will dive into a topic that touches the core of many relationships, but often remains cloaked in silence… intimacy anorexia.

This situation that couples face, either intentional or unconscious, involves one partner consistently avoiding intimacy with the other. The consequences of this are profound emotional distance and a disheartening lack of connection that can feel isolating for both partners involved.

My intention in writing this post is to shed some light on intimacy anorexia, so as to help couples understand and navigate this difficult and challenging situation they both face.

My goal is not just to discuss but to provide some practical strategies for those couples wanting to bridge the gap between them, and most importantly, to heal together.

Wether you are directly impacted by this issue or know someone who is, understanding these dynamics can be the first step toward fostering healthier, more connected relationships. So I will now explore how to recognize, understand, and ultimately overcome intimacy anorexia.

Understanding Intimacy Anorexia

Rcognizing the Signs

When talking about intimacy anorexia, it’s not always evident at first glance. Some common signs include a noticeable lack of sexual intimacy, a persistent avoidance of deep, personal conversations, and a general air of emotional unavailability.

What is noticeable, is that these behaviours are not just occasional, they are consistent patterns that act as barriers, preventing a relationship from reaching its full emotional and intimate potential.

Exploring Causes

Understanding the root causes of intimacy anorexia is crucial in addressing and healing from it.

For many couples, this situation stems from past traumas or deep-seated fears of intimacy that might not be immediately apparent. Mental health issues can also play a significant role, influencing one’s ability to connect with their partner intimately.

By digging deeper into these causes, couples can begin to unravel the complex feelings and barriers that one or both partners are facing, setting the stage for healing and rejuvenation of their intimate bond.

Strategies for Overcoming Intimacy Anorexia

Open Communication

One of the foundational steps in overcoming intimacy anorexia is encouraging open communication between each other.

It’s crucial for both partners to feel safe in expressing their feelings, fears, and desires without judgement. Establishing regular check-ins can be incredibly beneficial, as these discussions provide a vehicle to talk about each other’s needs and the overall health of the relationship.

This practice helps in slowly dismantling the walls that intimacy anorexia builds.

Professional Help

Counselling can offer a structured and safe environment for working through these issues. Couples counselling, or individual counselling, can provide insights and strategies tailored to specific needs of your relationship, facilitating a deeper understanding of the healing process.

Rebuilding Intimacy

Rebuilding intimacy often requires taking gradual, deliberate steps towards physical closeness, starting with simple gestures like holding hands or sharing a hug. Additionally, engaging in non-sexual intimate activities such as enjoying common hobbies or planning regular date nights can significantly enhance emotional connections.

These actions help in rekindling intimacy and trust, paving the way for a more connected and fulfilling relationship

Implementing Daily Practices

Routine Time Together

Ensuring that you organize dedicated together-time can plya a pivotal role in healing from intimacy anorexia. It’s about carving out specific times during the day or week that are exclusively for the two of you, free from the distractions of daily life.

Wether these activities are cooking a meal together, taking morning walks, or simply enjoying a coffee, tea or chia latte in silence, these moments can significantly enhance your emotional connection by ensuring you both prioritize each other.

Expressing Appreciation

Never underestimate the power of expressing gratitude and appreciation in nurturing a positive relationship environment.

Simple acts of kindness and words of appreciation can make a significant difference. It could be something as straightforward as thanking your partner for their effort around the house or acknowledging their professional achievements.

Regularly vocalizing your appreciation not only uplifts the spirit but also reinforces the emotional bond between you, making each other feel valued and loved everyday.

Healing Through Shared Experiences

Creating New Memories

One of the best paths ot healing is through creating new, positive memories together. Planning trips, exploring new hobbies, or even engaging in simple activities like game nights or local events can inject excitement and joy into your relationship.

These shared experiences build a reservoir of happy memories that can help dilute the impact of past negative interactions, bringing a fresh perspective and renewed energy to both partners.

Support Systems

Having a strong support system is essential when navigating the challenges of intimacy anorexia. This means leaning on friends, family, or community groups who understand and respect your journey towards healing.

These networks can offer not just emotional support, but also offer practical advice and encouragement. It’s important to choose environments and people who honour your privacy and provide the kind of support that aligns with your needs as a couple, fostering a safe space for both personal and collective growth.


In summary, the things that help overcome intimacy anorexia and reinforce the bong between partners. Open communication, professional help, and rebuilding intimacy are crucial steps towards mending the emotional distance created by intimacy anorexia.

Implementing daily practices like routine together-time and expressing appreciation can further enhance connection and ensure that both partners feel valued and loved.

Furthermore, healing through shared experiences and leaning on supportive friends and family can provide the strength and resilience needed to navigate this journey.

Remember, overcoming intimacy anorexia is a process that requires patience, understanding, and consistent effort from both partners.

I encourage both partners to take proactive steps towards healing together.

Similar Posts